Farm to Cheek: Grooming Products Good Enough to Eat

It would be difficult to overstate the amount of shower time we spend meditating on our next meal (let’s just say it’s a head of lettuce shy of Cosmo Kramer’s hare brained shower food scheme). So we devised a way to bring our favorite table top indulgences sink and shower-side without installing a bathtub disposal. Presenting: the foodie’s guide to nearly-edible grooming essentials.

Fresh Squeezed Clean

Jock Soap
Start the day by scrubbing up with a supersized slab of citrus, to feel like you’ve just downed a tall glass of OJ. The conditioning coconut oils in Jock Soap’s Bloody Orange Body Bar are as good for your skin as that daily dose of vitamin C is for your immune system.

Exfoli-ATE

Suki
Applying the sugar-sweet, lemon zest combo in Suki’s Exfoliate Foaming Cleanser is nearly as satisfying as eating a lemon tart fresh out of the oven. The scrub is made with rice flour and actual raw sugar, which works to take off any expired skin cells without running your skin’s natural hydration wells dry.

Grand Slam Lather

Bacon Soap
A northern Wisconsin mom-n-pop soap shop has found a way to waft essence of pan-fried bacon drizzled with maple syrup straight into their natural shaving lather. The scent is best activated when sliding the shaving soap into a scuttle—a ceramic pot designed to thicken and warm your lather. No word yet on hash-brown lotion.

Raise a Pint of Suds

Beer Soap
Since a stout would pair best with a sweetmeat, reach for a Black & Tan Organic Soap Bar. Real beer is mixed with castor oils, then molded together in a pint-glass shape, complete with frothing rim. Proteins in the hops act as hair-strengtheners and shiners, to mellow out your mane.

Pudding or…Lotion?

Chocolate Body Cream
Finish off with a rich and decadent moisturizer like Chocolate Fig Skin Cream. This thick hydrator is crafted on Long Winter Farm in Maine by grafting together the scents of succulent honey-like figs with smooth, milky coco for a gratifying way to instill moisture into dry skin.

Laura Peach

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