An Open Letter to First-Time Beard Grower Justin Bieber

Justin Bieber is growing a beard. Or maybe he's just neglected to shave for a week. Either way, we're proud of the guy.

Dear Justin,

We can't relate to most of your life experiences—global fame as a young teenager, platinum records, getting killed on CSI, paparazzi following you everywhere, making out with Selena Gomez—but your most recent exploit is something we've all gone through, and we couldn't be more excited for you on this new journey.

While your burgeoning facial hair is sparse and light, we encourage you to keep growing it out. Fight through these early awkward days. You'll probably get mocked by more hirsute men, but you're no stranger to mockery, and no amount of backlash has ever stopped you from selling records, selling out concerts, and generally "Beliebing" in yourself, right? We would, however, recommend trying a little Just for Men: It'll darken those those early-stage chin wisps and make that Van Dyke look twice as full. This guide to the first 30 days of beard growth should help too.

You're only 20 years old, and you've seen things and done things in the past seven years that 99.999999% of humans will never experience. Embrace this journey, because it makes you more like the rest of us, it helps us relate to you, and in the slightest way, indicates that maybe you're rounding the corner into adulthood (and putting your house-egging days behind you).

Best of luck on this next chapter,

The Birchbox Man Editorial Team

Related Stories

  • Nothing to recommend at this moment.
comments powered by Disqus
Get a monthly box of five personalized beauty samples.
Get a monthly box of personalized grooming samples, plus a stylish accessory.